Tonight I practiced on the deck, looking at the most beautiful view. I thought about listening to music. But there was something lovely in the sounds of the outdoors.
I listened to the birds singing to my flows. I felt the gentle wind that cooled me right when I needed it. I balanced finding a focal point on the hills. I looked up at the half moon starting to make it’s way into the blue sky.
My body moved with grace. I had more focus and balance than I have ever had. I connected my soul with the beauty around me. Something very special in this practice moved me. Meet the outdoors around you and you’ll be at peace.
I changed my hair recently. I needed a fresh start. I am putting the past behind and moving forward.
Today I let my hair down. I had the windows down and the music up. It was me. The true and pure form of myself. Everything I love today has been a struggle but worth every mistake. I’ve stumbled through life to be exactly where I was meant to be.
Everything feels like it’s coming together and all at once. Which can be exciting and happy but also really scary. After what I’ve been through, it seems that good is too good to be true. That’s when it all is taken away.
But today my only choice is to feel the crisp wind of spring blowing through that window, the sun warming my cheeks, the gentle rain when I left my coat. These are the feelings of being alive.
Life is good.
I have dreamed of working in media since my freshman year in high school where I met a teacher who would change the course of my life leading up to this moment. That teacher was Mr. Doug McComas. I found where I wanted to be and where I would try to get to for the next 20+ years.
I’ve wanted to be in media. I found Marketing and loved that equally. But bounced around never marrying the two. Now, I’m an Advertising Account Executive with the local TV Station, NCWLife.
I’m beyond excited. The excitement of news and deadlines energizes me. I almost can’t believe I’m working along some Wenatchee greats: Steve Hair? Eric Grandstrom? Lisa Bradshaw? Dan Kuntz? Yeah. Yeah. I know, star struck listening to their voices as I walk around is crazy. Steve Hair was right in front of me today. Like right there, talking and having a normal conversation in his voice!
Okay, maybe not everyone would act like an idiot not being able to speak in front of Steve Hair. Or being so silly awkward in front of Dan Kuntz. But seriously, I’m such a dork for this and don’t even care.
I’ve really been cyber stalking them for months. Watching, contacting, all of it.
So it’s the dream of all dreams for me, just let me take it in. Can’t wait to get started on this ride.
It’s been a week since I felt like writing. It’s been a week where I’m just running the rate race and loosing.
Today I had a powerful experience that reignited something deep inside. I won’t write about it. It’s just that special to me. But for all those involved, know you each touched my heart and I love each of you.
I also did some meditation before class and had an experience and a mind set going in. In mediation a deep calm comes over me. I can let the trying hard goes away and I can be with what is.
I always hated the saying “it is what it is.” Today I got my version that I like much better. It Just Is. something so simple can carry such a big punch.
My light has been found and today I flipped the switch. I feel changed, transformed. Not into something better, just into what is.
What this means to me: it’s more than just stealing. In fact, I’ve avoided this and pushed it off farther than I should. Doing some research, I know why. Non-stealing to me is avoiding greed, or trying to rob someone else or myself of happiness. It’s finding peace in where I am, and where I’m not. It’s deciding I have enough. Not longing for what someone else has, but loving what I have.
Through gossip and putting others down, we are trying to steal their happiness.
On the mat, I very often want what someone else has. A posture, a balance, a body. I long for what I don’t have. All I can do is be where I am at right now. And know all I need is in my control. Not what I want, what I need.
Off the mat, I can use this principal I every part of my life. I will not steal happiness from others but celebrate in thier happiness. Only when we are happy in where we are we can be happy.
Everything in my life has lead me to right here, right now. In this moment, I don’t want what anyone has, I love what I have.
I won’t steal happiness from anyone, there’s plenty to go around.
I’ve always considered myself against violence. But in reality, I’ve been mad enough. I can use this reminder.
What it means to me? Being calm, not letting my anger get out of control. Loving more than fighting.
How can I practice in yoga? Loving my practice, no matter what struggles I have, being kind and loving to my body.
How I practice in life? I’ve lately let spiders live. This has been a big struggle to not focus on them, watch them so I know where they go. It seems like a silly little thing but I’ve made peace with them. Knowing most of them won’t hurt me. Although I’ve had my share of bites, I know many more just live and move on their way eventually.
How I plan on applying this limb more? Being kind and forgiving to myself and others. Live and let live. Knowing everyone has struggles I know nothing about. Everyone makes choices every day. Today, I’ll choose love over anger, life over death, kindness and understanding over judgement.
I couldn’t sleep last night. Usually it’s stress related, but last night it was happiness. I’m grateful and content. Happy to be where I’m at and settled in my life.
I’ve reduced some stress and drama that I didn’t need and have focused on healing myself and my family and it’s all coming together.
Just a few moments in bed, happy. To be alive, to be moving forward. Breathing in and out pure joy. I’m thankful for all that I have and I have everything I need. My heart is full and I feel truly blessed.
Take a moment now and then and find contentment in your life.